Evan's Eyes


I believe we're seeing a miracle of modern Artificial Intelligence, as I suspect this film was created entirely by a computer! Not the special effects, the script! Unfortunately, it comes out like someone hooked up a plot generator (you know, one of those programs that randomly selects a character, a location, a conflict and a climax from thousands of possibilities (for example, it could spew out "sheriff," "an island," "a giant shark eating people," and "hero explodes air tank to save the day," which gives you the elements to write "Jurassic Park")), with a cybernetic cliché-rehasher that uses characters, scenes and dialog clipped from other movies to "create" an "original" script. Really.

If you've seen any previews, you know the premise is "autonomous high-tech fighter plane goes out of control," which is the classic "scientific experiment gone Horribly Wrong" story. Rather than create a new character for the jet's computer brain, they apparently used Hal from 2001, but without any understanding of the conflict he represented. So instead of a fascinating exploration of the ethics of a synthetic consciousness in a warplane, it's merely a robotic "Blue Thunder" without Roy Scheider. Many other elements were taken from that film, and others were snipped from "Top Gun," "Behind Enemy Lines," and frighteningly, "Short Circuit." And we see the LARGEST floating plot contrivance in a movie EVER!

If you don't mind the cinematic equivalent of eating someone else's leftovers, there's lots of supersonic jet flying, gunfire, explosions and not too much talking, filmed in a style reminiscent of a camera dropped down a stairway. At least the visual-effects computers worked overtime, doing an impressive job of making the high-tech planes and air battles look real (what you can see of them, anyway). Perhaps one day computers will write creative scripts for action movies with fresh ideas, compelling stories and complex characters. Until then, we'll have to wait for humans to do it.

If you liked the movies below, you'll probably like this one (and vice versa):

  • Blue Thunder (which is actually better than "Stealth")
  • Top Gun (which is actually better than "Stealth")
  • I, Robot (which is actually better than "Stealth")
  • Short Circuit (which actually has Ally Sheedy in it)
Overall Rating: 3 (where 1=Worthless, 10=Fabulous)

Eight-Facet Info Rating, rated on a scale of 0 (None) to 4 (Lots!)):

Humor: 1
Nudity: 0
Sexual Reference: 1
Sexual Activity: 0
Action: 4
Gore: 1
Violence: 3
Profanity: 1

Stealth has Josh Lucas, Jessica Biel, Jamie Foxx, Sam Shepard, Richard Roxburgh in it.


© 2005 Evan M. Nichols